40 GMC Jokes and One-Liners

1. My GMC doesn’t need an alarm system—the sound of it trying to start scares everyone away.
2. GMC stands for “Got Mechanic Coming.”
3. They say GMC trucks are built tough. Tough on your wallet, that is.
4. What’s the difference between a GMC and a boat?
   A boat will start when you turn the key.
5. I bought a GMC because I wanted to experience “check engine” light therapy.
6. GMC owners don’t count miles per gallon—they count miles per tow.
7. Why don’t GMC owners need a gym membership?
   Because they’re always pushing their trucks.
8. My GMC has Bluetooth. Every time I hit a bump, another “tooth” falls out.
9. GMC: the official sponsor of roadside friendships.
10. If patience is a virtue, GMC owners must be saints.
11. My GMC runs like a dream—specifically, the kind where you wake up sweating.
12. Why do GMC trucks make great musicians?
    Because they’re always knocking.
13. They asked me if my GMC was four-wheel drive.
    I said it’s more like “no-wheel drive.”
14. GMC stands for “Got More Complaints.”
15. I told my GMC a joke… it stalled before the punchline.
16. Owning a GMC is like a relationship—lots of work, lots of money, and sometimes you just want to walk away.
17. What’s the most reliable part of a GMC?
    The steering wheel—it’s the only thing that hasn’t fallen off yet.
18. GMC trucks don’t leak—they mark their territory.
19. I didn’t buy a GMC for transportation—I bought it for character development.
20. GMC stands for “Garage Most of the Century.”
21. Why don’t GMC owners play hide-and-seek?
    Because you can hear the engine knocking a mile away.
22. My GMC’s air conditioning works great—as long as the windows are down.
23. They say GMC trucks are like loyal dogs… mine sits in the driveway and whines.
24. I asked my GMC for directions once. It just pointed to the mechanic.
25. My GMC doesn’t need cruise control—it barely moves fast enough to need it.
26. GMC: Giving Mechanics Cash since 1911.
27. What’s a GMC owner’s favorite exercise?
    Wallet lifting.
28. My GMC is a hybrid… it runs on gas and disappointment.
29. You don’t just buy a GMC—you adopt a lifestyle of waiting rooms.
30. They asked me if my GMC had any horsepower. I said yeah—about two, and they’re tired.
31. My GMC has heated seats. Turns out it’s just the exhaust leak.
32. GMC: the only truck that comes with frequent flyer miles for your tow truck driver.
33. People say driving a GMC is relaxing… that’s because you’re always parked.
34. My GMC is great for the environment—it never leaves the driveway.
35. GMC stands for “Got Mechanic’s Children.” (Because you’re paying for their college.)
36. My GMC has the latest technology. It can stream oil leaks in real time.
37. What’s the difference between a GMC and a shopping cart?
    A shopping cart goes straight.
38. GMC trucks are like campfires—smoky, unpredictable, and sometimes hard to start.
39. If you ever need a good icebreaker, just drive a GMC. Everyone will ask if you need a ride.
40. They told me a GMC would last a lifetime.
    They just didn’t say whose lifetime.